Friday, March 15, 2013

Redemption








Trifextra: Week Fifty-Nine

A chill mist coils amid the heated crowd 
Cooling and containing.

 In small pockets of relief and reflection,
Tension flushed faces slacken into peaceful tone as
Angry sweat gives way to goose flesh.



Photo credit: Bérenger ZYLA / Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND
This weekend we're asking for exactly 33 words inspired by this photo.  . 
Posted by Renee at 9:11 PM
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19 comments:

  1. Valerie BoersmaMarch 15, 2013 at 9:53 PM

    I love the sense of calm that washes over this piece as it progresses-until "angry sweat gives way to goose flesh."

    Amazingly written!!

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    Replies
    1. ReneeMarch 15, 2013 at 10:21 PM

      Thank you, Valerie! I can't leave well enough alone. Gotta go weirdo.

      Delete
  2. katie eggemanMarch 15, 2013 at 11:54 PM

    The chill cooling and containing heat. A good line.

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  3. barbaraMarch 16, 2013 at 12:32 AM

    pockets of relief and reflection - that is a beautiful turn of phrase.

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    Replies
    1. ReneeMarch 16, 2013 at 5:36 PM

      Thanks, Barbara! Sometimes the Muse just has her way with me. ;-)

      Delete
  4. Sharp Little PencilMarch 16, 2013 at 2:09 AM

    Renee, I love how you blended mood, movement, and temperature together. The picture is evocative, and you did the prompt associated with it proud!

    Thanks also for stopping by my blog and commenting. Good work, hon. Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.com/2013/03/15/mama-needs-a-brand-new-bag-a-barlette/

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    Replies
    1. ReneeMarch 16, 2013 at 5:38 PM

      Thank you, Amy! I appreciate your comment, and I'm glad you enjoyed the story.

      Delete
  5. AnonymousMarch 16, 2013 at 3:26 AM

    nice descriptions

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  6. DraugMarch 16, 2013 at 9:36 AM

    Ooo I felt the gooseflesh rising on my arms!

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  7. AnonymousMarch 16, 2013 at 4:26 PM

    Oooh, I felt that drop in temperature. Well done.

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    Replies
    1. ReneeMarch 16, 2013 at 5:39 PM

      Thank you, Sarah! I was hoping that would come across.

      Delete
  8. SuzanneMarch 16, 2013 at 5:55 PM

    So lovely! Makes me long for those warm summer days under the sprinkler... Well done!

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  9. kymmMarch 16, 2013 at 7:21 PM

    Nice interplay of hot and cold.

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  10. AnonymousMarch 17, 2013 at 11:32 AM

    The gooseflesh made me think that they were maybe being lulled into peace against their will. But that's clearly just me! I too loved the hot/cold contrast and the moistness.

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  11. Silversound7March 17, 2013 at 4:37 PM

    Lovely and visceral!

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousMarch 17, 2013 at 5:29 PM

    that was a very soothing piece. the sense of calm from hot to cold, very well done.

    ReplyDelete

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